One of my dear students vowed that she would write a play titled "Speak Slower." This play would be about the love story that my husband and I have lived through. She was in eighth grade when she made this promise, and she is now working on the masterpiece. She is getting ready to be a senior. I am writing our love story here. This is to help her along, but I have always wanted to get it written for Aarao and I as well. I am going to do my best to write it in present tense using my memories and journals. This will take me a while. Here it goes.
Chapter 1:
I haven't been home for a summer vacation since my sophomore year of college. This year will be no different in that aspect. However, this summer, the summer of 2007, is different in the fact that I will be leaving the country to spend my summer in Brazil. I will be working at a church teaching conversational English skills to people using the Bible. I am so nervous about it. I had a hard time committing to this. I seem to have that problem when God is calling me to do something. I have spent the past few years seeking God's will and doing things outside of my comfort zone, but it doesn't always come so easy.
In 2005 and 2006 I spent my summers counseling teenage girls at a summer camp. I knew the Lord was calling to Camp Wyldewood in 2004 when I was there for a retreat, but I was too afraid to follow his lead. I regret that decision, but I did finally go a year later. Camp Wyldewood was amazing, and it changed my life. I grew with God more than I had ever done before. Getting to know the people there was such a blessing. I think that my decision to work there over the past two summers was one of the best decisions I have made. I was working in the Kingdom, and I am always wanting to do Kingdom work. When Let's Start Talking representatives spoke at a devotional our campus ministry in the fall, it seemed like a path that I should be taking in the Kingdom. I was so nervous about it that it took me a while to finally commit. As time gets closer, I get more and more anxious about it. A part of me can't believe that I committed to this. I'm just a little Arkansas girl. I have no business leaving the country for the summer.
I have spent the past semester doing my student teaching in Rogers, which is close to home. So, I have been living at home, and it sure is comfortable. I did go back to Russellville and Arkansas Tech University for training for the trip and to graduate of course. Graduation day was such a blessing. It was so good seeing my dear friends and celebrating with my family .The past four years have been life-changing. The people that I have met have become such an important part of my life. Actually, a few of them are going on this adventure too, which is quite comforting.
I will be going to Brazil with Cyndi, Lacy, Brian, and Craig. I know all of them through the CCSC, the campus ministry I have been involved in since my freshman year. I take comfort in the fact that I won't be alone in a foreign country. I definitely couldn't do it if that were the case.
I have been going to a house church since I've been living at home for the semester. The house church is associated with Grace Harbor Church, the community that I have been involved in. It has been such a blessing to have this community. Tonight my parents are with me at the house church. I am so happy that they came, because I will be prayed over before I leave. I know that this has been hard on them. I am their baby daughter. It would be so much easier for them if I would just settle down and stay home. I remember the day that I left for college. I get emotional every time I think about it, and it has been almost four years now.
I was so ready to start a new chapter of my life that summer. I had been so excited to go to college all year. I had visited the campus and auditioned for the college. I was ready to leave high school behind and start new. That didn't change the fact that I became an emotional wreck throughout the weeks leading up to my departure. I hadn't left my family behind like this ever. Mom and I cried often. Emotions were triggered by the simple things. A song on the radio about home would come on, and Mom would start the tears. The day that I left was worst. Family came over for breakfast while I packed and got ready to leave. At one point I just sat on the sofa and let my tears fall. Dad walked in and stood in front of me. He said, "Anna, you've got to stop that." He had tears in his eyes. I could see that he was trying to just get through it.
So, here we are almost four years after with tears in our eyes trying to get through it. The time has come for the house church to pray over me. They surround me and lay their hands on me to lift me up to the Lord. When Dad begins to pray I totally lose it. It breaks my heart to leave them. We all love each other so much.
Departing day has finally arrived. I have been an emotional wreck for days now. Everyone is my family is nervous about it. People have been saying that I don't have to go, and that it isn't too late to back out. However, I know that I must go. The Lord gives me strength. We stand in the airport in Little Rock. This is the most difficult moment that I have experienced over the past few weeks. I really am trying to be strong, but I am so scared. When Dad hugs me he whispers one word, "faith." Yes, I must have faith, and so must they. Mom and Dad must trust God with my life, because after all I have given my life to him.
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